by Amelia M.L. Montes
“Sometimes when
I’m working late into the night, they gather all around me. They sit and watch me. Sometimes it’s my tia
Chala, sometimes Pepe, others I don’t even know. Some are a combination of two spirits.”
“When my aunt
died, all the lights of the house went out. I had to talk to her, to calm her
down so all the lights would go back on.
It took a few minutes.”
“It’s true what
they say about us Chicanos—that we know the other side, and I’m not talking
about the physical border which we know too well. We know the other side because we are not afraid.”
“She was so loud
despues que se murio. Everyone had a
dream about her, or they felt her. But it wasn’t anything scary. I think of it this way: She was so excited to be in this
other dimension, she was determined to share at least a wisp of it with us.”
“We eat the
bread, the pan de muertos. I always save
some of mine and break it into little pieces.
I put some on the altar, but then I put some on the table by the bed,
just in case. I drink my atole, and
leave the bread, para que tengan, si quieren.”
“Once, a
Catholic nun told me: ‘we know more of what death, God. or heaven is not, than
what death, God, or heaven is.’
Imaginate! —a Catholic nun said that.”
“We bring the
table mi papa built 50 years ago to the front room, and we cover it with el
mantel that mama loved—and we go from there.
The kids bring whatever they want:
their drawings, figs from the tree in the backyard, the bread,
flowers too, little Olivia likes putting dirt en un frasco for them. Last year we made incense,
and Gustavo brought the candles. He also
made new frames for the pictures. It always looks warm and inviting. They all come, and we eat.”
“We never painted calavera faces until I got together con Cecilia.
She said her familia always did it.
Mine never did. Now we take turns
painting each other’s caras every year. I'd like to do it more often. I like taking the time to really look, I mean really look at her when I paint her face, the way we see on that day . . .
“Three generations have been born and died in
this house. So we remember them
today. Their umbilical cords are buried
over there near the maple tree and, pues, since we still haven’t scattered the
ashes—we just put them on the altar. We
talk, we eat, we drink, we dance. It's a good
time. Then, we put everything away. The ashes go back in the
closet. I guess we just want to keep
them with us. I doubt we’ll scatter them
any time soon.”
You know what
they say: “Al vivo todo le falta, y al
muerto todo le sobra.”
José Guadalupe Posada |
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